Untitled

I am the future of boobs!! FEAR ME!!

I am the future of boobs!! FEAR ME!!

Was the phrase “break a leg” meaning good luck before a performance originally jokingly said the the actors’ understudies? It makes sense because if the actor breaks his or her leg, the part then goes to the understudy, which the phrase would have just been witty banter. Does anybody know the origin story and can tell me?

YOU SEE THESE MOTHER FUCKERS RIGHT HERE?
THEY ARE POOL NOODLES AND THEY ARE METAL AS FUCK THEY COME IN ALL SHAPES AND COLORS SOMETIMES EVEN PATTERNS WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE YOU KNOW YOU WERE GANGSTER IF YOU HAD THESE BITCHES DIVE INTO THE FUCKING POOL FOR ONE OF THESE THEY FLOAT AND YOU CAN TRY INK THEM BUT THESE BITCHES JUST POP BACK UP IF YOU CAN’T SWIM IT’S IGHT THEY GOT YOU THEY NEVER LET YOU DOWN YOU COULD ALSO PLAY KNIGHT AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR FRIEND WITH IT LIFE JACKETS? FUCK THAT POOL NOODLES GOT ME EVERY FUCKING COLOR. YOU FRUITY AS HELL? GET EVERY COLOR FOR THE FLAG AND WATCH THEM FLOAT. YEAH THESE WERE MY HOMIES WHEN I WAS YOUNG AND WHEN I WALK DOWN THE AISLE THEY GONNA BE THERE IN FUCKING TUXEDOS AND GODDAMN THEY’RE GONNA BE MY BEST MEN.

MOTHER FUCKER I THINK YOU FORGOT THAT THESE FUCKIN’ NOODLES COULD BECOME A GODDAMN THRONE OF WATER. LOOK AT THAT BITCH SHE’S QUEEN OF THE GODDAMN POOL. NOBODY FUCKS WITH A NOODLE NOT EVEN ONCE, IF YOU WHERE RIDIN’ ONE OF THESE SICK ASS BITCHES YOU WHERE A MOTHERFUCKING TANK. 
YOU INTO AMERICA? WELL DON’T WORRY THE NOODLES GOT ‘YAH. BACKIN YOU UP FUCKIN’ FREEDOM STYLE, THEY’LL KEEP YOU FREE AND STOP TERRIOST GODDAMNIT. 

YOU WANNA RE=DO STAR WARS, WELL DON’T WORRY MOTHERFUCKER. THESE TIGHT ASS BITCHES GOT YAH LIKE A FUCKIN CULT. 
OMFG I THINK I LOVE YOU. BUT YOU FORGOT ONE MORE THING:
YOU WANNA GO RULE ATLANTIS? IGHT MOTHER FUCKER, GET ON YOUR TRUNKS AND GRAB YOUR POWERADE BECAUSE BITCH WERE GONNA TAKE OVER KINGDOMS WITH THESE MOTHER FUCKERS.
WE DONT PLAY GAMES HERE, WE FUCKING START WARS. 

VIVA LA NOODLE-CION! 

WE’RE STARTING A GODDAMN ZOO MOTHERFUCKER.
LOOK AT THOSE LIL’SHITS, CUTE AS FUCK. DOWN RIGHT ADORABLE.
AND IF THAT AIN’T ENOUGH FOR YOU SICK BASTARDS. THEN LOOK AT THESE LIL’SHITS.

FUCKIN GLOW IN THE DARK IS WHERE IT’S AT YO, NEED TO SEE UNDER WATER AT NIGHT? MAYBE BECOME A SPY FOR ‘MURICA. WELL DON’T WORRY THESE BITCHES WILL YOU GET YOU INTO A FUCKING BASE IN NO TIME, SOMEBODY SEEN YOU? DON’T WORRY SLAP THAT MOTHERFUCKER OUT WITH A NOODLE.
NOODLE VIETNAM!
IF YOU CANT FUCKING AFFORD TO MAKE A COSPLAY FOR GODDAMN OTAKON, THATS IGHT ; YOU CAN BE SPIDER MAN. MOTHER FUCKING UNWANTED SPIDER MAN. 

LOOK AT THAT CRAFTSMANSHIP BITCHES. YOULL BE SURE TO WIN JUDGE’S CHOICE AND GODDAMN FIRST PLACE IN THE HALL CONTEST. YOU STRUT THOSE GODDAMN NOODLE LEGS, GURL. YOU STRUT THEM. 
IN CHINA THEY KNOW THE WAY OF THE NOODLE. 

I MEAN LOOK AT THIS SHIT, FUCKING DRAWING THAT’S WHAT. CHILLING WITH FRIENDS AND LOOKING LIKE SWAG TANKS WITH THEIR GODDAMN NOODLES.
SEE WE AIN’T GOT TIME FOR NO BULLSHIT RIPOFFS.
SO SIT DOWN, RELAX, AND BEAT A BITCH WITH A NOODLE YOU LIL’BEAST.

MUTHAFUCKIN’ CTHULHU.
THE BEST PART
ALL YOU NEED ARE A MOUTH AND A NOODLE AND YOU’VE GOT A MOTHER FUCKING WATER CANNON

GET ONE LONG ENOUGH AND YOU CAN USE YOUR CANNON AS A THRONE WHILE YOU BLAST MOTHERFUCKERS AWAY

AND IF YOU WERE REALLY COOL
YOU HAD

MOTHER

FUCKING

CONNECTORS

THANKS RIGHT
THESE WEREN’T JUST THE ABSOLUTE GODDAMN BEST WATER TOYS EVER
THEY WERE ALSO THE MOTHERFUCKING LEGO OF THE SEA

YOU SEE THESE MOTHER FUCKERS RIGHT HERE?

THEY ARE POOL NOODLES AND THEY ARE METAL AS FUCK
THEY COME IN ALL SHAPES AND COLORS
SOMETIMES EVEN PATTERNS
WHEN YOU WERE LITTLE YOU KNOW YOU WERE GANGSTER IF YOU HAD THESE
BITCHES DIVE INTO THE FUCKING POOL FOR ONE OF THESE
THEY FLOAT AND YOU CAN TRY INK THEM
BUT THESE BITCHES JUST POP BACK UP
IF YOU CAN’T SWIM IT’S IGHT THEY GOT YOU
THEY NEVER LET YOU DOWN
YOU COULD ALSO PLAY KNIGHT AND BEAT THE SHIT OUT OF YOUR FRIEND WITH IT
LIFE JACKETS?
FUCK THAT POOL NOODLES GOT ME
EVERY FUCKING COLOR.
YOU FRUITY AS HELL?
GET EVERY COLOR FOR THE FLAG AND WATCH THEM FLOAT.
YEAH THESE WERE MY HOMIES WHEN I WAS YOUNG AND WHEN I WALK DOWN THE AISLE THEY GONNA BE THERE IN FUCKING TUXEDOS AND GODDAMN THEY’RE GONNA BE MY BEST MEN.

image

MOTHER FUCKER I THINK YOU FORGOT THAT THESE FUCKIN’ NOODLES COULD BECOME A GODDAMN THRONE OF WATER. LOOK AT THAT BITCH SHE’S QUEEN OF THE GODDAMN POOL. NOBODY FUCKS WITH A NOODLE NOT EVEN ONCE, IF YOU WHERE RIDIN’ ONE OF THESE SICK ASS BITCHES YOU WHERE A MOTHERFUCKING TANK. image

YOU INTO AMERICA? WELL DON’T WORRY THE NOODLES GOT ‘YAH. BACKIN YOU UP FUCKIN’ FREEDOM STYLE, THEY’LL KEEP YOU FREE AND STOP TERRIOST GODDAMNIT. 

image

YOU WANNA RE=DO STAR WARS, WELL DON’T WORRY MOTHERFUCKER. THESE TIGHT ASS BITCHES GOT YAH LIKE A FUCKIN CULT. 

OMFG I THINK I LOVE YOU. BUT YOU FORGOT ONE MORE THING:

YOU WANNA GO RULE ATLANTIS? IGHT MOTHER FUCKER, GET ON YOUR TRUNKS AND GRAB YOUR POWERADE BECAUSE BITCH WERE GONNA TAKE OVER KINGDOMS WITH THESE MOTHER FUCKERS.

WE DONT PLAY GAMES HERE, WE FUCKING START WARS. 

image

VIVA LA NOODLE-CION! 

image

WE’RE STARTING A GODDAMN ZOO MOTHERFUCKER.

LOOK AT THOSE LIL’SHITS, CUTE AS FUCK. DOWN RIGHT ADORABLE.

AND IF THAT AIN’T ENOUGH FOR YOU SICK BASTARDS. THEN LOOK AT THESE LIL’SHITS.

image

FUCKIN GLOW IN THE DARK IS WHERE IT’S AT YO, NEED TO SEE UNDER WATER AT NIGHT? MAYBE BECOME A SPY FOR ‘MURICA. WELL DON’T WORRY THESE BITCHES WILL YOU GET YOU INTO A FUCKING BASE IN NO TIME, SOMEBODY SEEN YOU? DON’T WORRY SLAP THAT MOTHERFUCKER OUT WITH A NOODLE.

NOODLE VIETNAM!

IF YOU CANT FUCKING AFFORD TO MAKE A COSPLAY FOR GODDAMN OTAKON, THATS IGHT ; YOU CAN BE SPIDER MAN. MOTHER FUCKING UNWANTED SPIDER MAN. 

image

LOOK AT THAT CRAFTSMANSHIP BITCHES. YOULL BE SURE TO WIN JUDGE’S CHOICE AND GODDAMN FIRST PLACE IN THE HALL CONTEST. YOU STRUT THOSE GODDAMN NOODLE LEGS, GURL. YOU STRUT THEM. 

IN CHINA THEY KNOW THE WAY OF THE NOODLE.image 

image

I MEAN LOOK AT THIS SHIT, FUCKING DRAWING THAT’S WHAT. CHILLING WITH FRIENDS AND LOOKING LIKE SWAG TANKS WITH THEIR GODDAMN NOODLES.

SEE WE AIN’T GOT TIME FOR NO BULLSHIT RIPOFFS.

SO SIT DOWN, RELAX, AND BEAT A BITCH WITH A NOODLE YOU LIL’BEAST.

image

MUTHAFUCKIN’ CTHULHU.

THE BEST PART

ALL YOU NEED ARE A MOUTH AND A NOODLE AND YOU’VE GOT A MOTHER FUCKING WATER CANNON

image

GET ONE LONG ENOUGH AND YOU CAN USE YOUR CANNON AS A THRONE WHILE YOU BLAST MOTHERFUCKERS AWAY

image

AND IF YOU WERE REALLY COOL

YOU HAD

image


MOTHER

image

FUCKING

image

CONNECTORS

image

THANKS RIGHT

THESE WEREN’T JUST THE ABSOLUTE GODDAMN BEST WATER TOYS EVER

THEY WERE ALSO THE MOTHERFUCKING LEGO OF THE SEA

image

(Source: dersekingdom, via transientday)

liamdryden:

commiepumpkin:

Why is no one freaking out over Mater from Cars? The guy lives in a junkyard full of car parts… which wouldn’t be that bad if he didn’t exist in a universe of talking cars

He sleeps surrounded by discarded organs and hollowed out corpses

The Cars universe is so fucked up if you give it more than twenty seconds of thought

(via catastrophic-error)

Little did we know, Iron Man and the Hulk first met in the seventies.
Little did we know, Iron Man and the Hulk first met in the seventies.
I hope the NSA likes this picture

I hope the NSA likes this picture

taylornhicks:

My favorite part of this photo is that there is absolutely no reason for Jason Segel to be in it and yet there he is laying on Seth Rogen

I love it every time I see it.

taylornhicks:

My favorite part of this photo is that there is absolutely no reason for Jason Segel to be in it and yet there he is laying on Seth Rogen

I love it every time I see it.

(via senpai-noticed-you-so-he)

isitrealloveorisitjustmadness:

when even fox says that you cheated the laws then that means you’re really fucked 

(Source: 70sheadandmodernlover, via toriinn)